Thursday, June 14, 2007


People have been telling me for months that I need to have a blog. A real blog. About my life and not about my babies. Although, lets be honest, how could I not talk about them non stop?? So, I've bitten the bullet and decided to start one. I'm not sure how many people will actually find it interesting as my life mainly consists of diaper duty, breast feeding and cleaning. Occasionally I get to go outside of my home to explore the great unknown that is Germany. But that is really quite rare. Maybe 1 or 2 times a week. And even then it's not like I'm exploring new ground. In the 7 months I have been here, I've only driven to 5 places. Well, I've been out more than 5 times, but I've only gone to those 5 places. Having 2 kids under the age of 2 just doesn't allow for much spontaneity.

So here's a little bit about me: I've been married to my husband for almost 3 years. We have 2 kids, W, who's currently 21 months and CB, who's currently 4 months. Yes, both of them were planned and we wanted them close together, so stop asking. Some tell me that by having children now, I have thrown my life away because my life before marriage and babies was so promising. I tell them to shut it.

Before I was married to the Army and had babies, I was a full time student and got my degree in Politics and Government and my almost degree in Psychology. I hated my college career. I will never go back. It sucks when you are smarter than most of the professors. After I got my degree and almost degree, I moved to Washington DC to work in the House of Representatives. That is what was so promising about my life. But I quickly found that I didn't want that life. Working 12-14 hours a day wasn't my thing. I'm too lazy for that. So instead, I put that life on hold until I could better handle the stresses and challenges. Not that being a full time mom is any easier!

Honestly, my life is full of stress. My husband is constantly gone and I am often left to take the role of mom, house cleaner, cook, and nanny alone. In the past 4 years, this is the longest I have lived in any one place. I don't speak German, nor do I read it, and I'm scared to death to drive on the autobahn. That makes life a bit difficult here. My life has been filled with drama galore, pain, heartache, laughter, tears, anger, pure rage, and unbearable, painful, and unconditional love.

One thing I have learned in the past few years is that if you don't have any expectations, you can't be disappointed when everything goes to hell. And, if something goes well, then you are pleasantly and happily surprised. That is why I have named this blog "No Expectations". It's become my coping mechanism and my life's motto.

No comments: