Monday, March 14, 2011

uber, super reality check

I am so glad that February was a short month because it was all kinds of dumb. It started out ok but somewhere around the middle of the month it just got stupid after a container of yogurt tried to kill me. Yes, it did. I was famished one night and grabbed a container of yogurt, not realizing it was past its expiration date AND had sat in the warm car for about 2 hours while I drove it home from the store. I didn't think it tasted too funny when I ate it, but it certainly didn't taste good about 4 hours later when I was in a heap on the bathroom floor, using a damp, most likely dirty, towel as a pillow and praying for the rapture to happen immediately.

A few days later, M had LASEK done on his eyes, which was great, except for the unforeseen complication of getting MRSA inside his eye, which lead to the threat of a cornea transplant, should his eye not get better and scar. Because that is just what we needed... a cornea transplant would most likely squash any hopes of him meeting his career goals, so we decided that if he did end up losing his eye, he'd stay home with the kids and wear an eye patch while I went off and joined the Airforce so we could keep our benefits. Neither option is anything we had ever thought put in our "5 year plan" so it was pretty scary having to consider all of those potential possibilities. The kids just thought it was cool that daddy might stay home with them and best of all BE A PIRATE!!

As he was healing up, thanks to heavy doses of steroids and antibiotics, CB woke up one morning with purple pin prick spots under her skin on her face, neck, ears, eyelids and chest. It was the weirdest thing I had ever seen. And because she had been complaining about her legs hurting badly the day before, of course my first thought was LEUKEMIA so I raced her to urgent care right away. The doctor came in and kind of glanced at her and said something about how she was sure it was just a reaction to something and that it would clear up soon with some benedryl, but when I interrupted her and said  that I had never seen a PURPLE PIN PRICK rash UNDER THE SKIN as a reaction to some kind of food, she looked up and then proceeded to join me in freaking the freak out. After labs in the office we were sent to do more specific labs at the hospital and then to the pharmacy for more steroids to see if that would help clear it up. Wanna know what a cup full of pee, 6 vials of blood and 2 finger pokes from a distraught 4 year old cost me? $19.99 for a Barbie and horse and another 20 bucks worth of Dollar Spot stuff, and I think I got off cheap. Thankfully, all of the labs were normal and the rash faded after a few days. We still don't know what caused it, but are praying hard that it doesn't come back.

Then MJ decided that sleeping was stupid, as was eating, and that she was going to throw up almost everything she did eat for a few days. Poor little thing was so miserable and pitiful and ended  up losing a couple of pounds. And in between all off that, I had a follow up appointment for my whacked out blood pressure and told the doctor that I didn't care what he said, I was going to have a stroke anyway at age 50 if I didn't stop waking up 47 times a night to go to the bathroom and practically passing out every time I stood up. So I got to stop those meds and, shockingly, my blood pressure actually went down!

Unfortunately, my whacked out blood pressure and kids being sick and all of the other garbage of February, piddle in comparison to the fantastically awesome news that March brought. M was sick with a nasty cold, and now all 4 kids are sick, and then there's my issues...

I am still very much in denial about what is going on with me right now. Blood pressure aside, I appear to be healthy but inside my body is a raging time bomb of cells, reproducing at an abnormally fast rate. A time bomb that was silent until a couple of weeks ago when I got the dreaded phone call and heard the words "precancerous" and "needs to be removed immediately".

So, there is your daily dose of happiness and joy. Holy Debbie Downer, I know. I have my pre-op appointment today, where we will discuss the specifics of what is going to happen and how it will impact our lives. I am so, so thankful I don't have cancer and that this was caught early but scared about going under the knife and anesthesia as I've never had to do either.

I really hate it when people are super cryptic about things and say that there is some life altering thing going on in their lives, but won't share exactly what it is... but I am going to be that person today. I'm not begging for prayers or asking people to be worried about me, because I WILL be fine, but both are appreciated if you feel so inclined. I promise to share all of the gory details once I know all of the facts and have a plan in place. Promise. Cross my heart, pinkie swear kind of promise.

6 comments:

Moore Musings said...

Thoughts & prayers definitely headed your way

Lanie said...

It always seems when it rains, it pours. Take it from a woman who has had 2 C-sections, a septoplasty (with wisdom teeth pulled) and major jaw surgery, going "under the knife" seems scary, especially with small children. But I promise you will be okay. I won't make light of the word precancerous and I will definitely be holding all of you up in my prayers. ~Lanie

Angela said...

Goodness, Jo! You are SO strong. Sending you lots of prayers for you and your family. Is it okay to pray you have a boring April? :)

jenncarlson said...

Praying yes! Enjoy having your mom there and relax some too. Love you and yes I am going to pray for an uneventful April!!

Jennifer said...

thoughts and prayers my dear. Here's to hoping April brings peace and uneventfulness-as much as your life can. hugs from TN!! If there's anything you want/need let me know. _Jen L.

Hilary said...

Oh gosh, Joanna, I'm so sorry! I'll definitely be praying for you!